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My attempts at Funny Be Yourself Everyone Else Is Already Taken A Twatwaffle Shirt learning the language have in many ways failed. It is creeping into my subconscious. I now know this for a fact rather than a fancy, because a week ago I actually had a dream some of which was in Czech. Am I certain it was Czech? No, as I didn’t entirely understand what was said in my dream, but I understood bits of it. Nevertheless I rather think that my brain has been processing Czech without me realising it. I do know and the context is such that I can probably guess a significant number of the rest. But speaking Czech – that is another matter. However even here I am beginning to detect signs of progress. I was recently complemented on my pronunciation of the famous Czech soft r – which apparently I pronounced perfectly.

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There is a downside to this: in the Funny Be Yourself Everyone Else Is Already Taken A Twatwaffle Shirts museum at Zumberk, as I had asked for the tickets etc in Czech, I was expected to translate for the guide. And did I manage it – do I hear you ask? Yes, some of it anyway. Yesterday I drove to England from the Czech Republic and I got linguistically extremely confused. Although German is officially my second language (I have an A level in it), I kept speaking in Czech both in Germany and France. Then on the ferry I actually managed to apologize to a Brit in Czech! Plans to let people across the United Kingdom meet up and celebrate Christmas together hang in the balance after medical experts warned it “will cost lives”.

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