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Why would you not tell your daughter? Do you not Awesome 70s Retro Vintage Foxy Mama 60s 80s Mothers Day Gift Shirt how kids are especially at that age? Your daughter is getting bullied because no one warned her. That her aunt did porn and then posted a picture with her. The only person I feel bad for is your daughter. Imagine having your entire school talking about your family members doing porn and getting shit about it 24/7. She’s 14 she’s going to lash out because of it. YTA. Your SIL is a grown adult who chooses the adult film industry. I agree, she shouldn’t be judged but she must have anticipated. That someone might recognize her from being in an adult film and that there is a social stigma attached to doing porn.

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A teenage boy watches porn and there is not one bit of judgment or Awesome 70s Retro Vintage Foxy Mama 60s 80s Mothers Day Gift Shirt coming in his direction, is there? Consuming it is ok for boys. But just being related to someone in it is not ok for girls. Trust me, your daughter is well aware of the sexism online. What she needs is for you to focus on the bullying right now. You need to be a soft place to land and give her some space. This will pass, but she needs coping mechanisms to get through it. If you’re unable to provide this, find a professional who can.  ESH. Your daughter was disrespectful but she’s also, now. A CHILD. She’s being bullied about this. Several people in this thread have already said it, but I’ll say it again.

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And should not be expected to Awesome 70s Retro Vintage Foxy Mama 60s 80s Mothers Day Gift Shirt take the higher ground. And fend off all her harassers at school without internalizing anything. She’s 14. Kids can be so vulnerable at that age and classmates can be so utterly brutal. YTA for making this post primarily about your SIL’s feelings and “privacy” and not really thinking about what your young teenage daughter is going through. Your husband is taking the much more evenhanded approach (no she shouldn’t have used that language) but you should both be supporting her through the bullying and working with her more gently through this.

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